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CHRISTMAS JOKES

What happened to the man who stole an Advent Calendar?

He got 25 days!

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?

A Christmas Quacker!

What is the best Christmas present in the world?

A broken drum, you just can’t beat it!

What says Oh Oh Oh?

Santa walking backwards!

Who is Santa’s favorite singer?

Elf-is Presley!

What did Santa do when he went speed dating?

He pulled a cracker

How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?

One that’s deep pan, crisp and even!

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?

A mince spy!

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It’s Christmas, Eve!

How did Mary and Joseph know that Jesus weighed 7lb 6oz when he was born?

They had a weigh in a manger

Presidential candidate Raila Odinga withdraws from October 26th 2017 elections

Exposed: Weinsten Sexual Harassment

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